Results Are In: I’m Pretty Damn Proud of myself.

With the final weeks of Med School approaching me, way faster than I imagined, I just wanted to post why I am proud of myself.  Sometimes, we rely on hearing from many other people on why they are proud we went back to school and so on and so forth, but today, I’m proud of myself.  I’m not going to hurt myself patting myself on the back but it’s good to appreciate yourself every once in a while.  🙂

1.)  I’m glad that I went back to school, even through at first, I had no direction.  None.  I’m glad that I kicked myself right in the ass and basically told myself that if I didn’t go back to school now, I wasn’t going to go back.  At least, the chances of me going back would significantly decrease over time.  So yes, I am glad I booted myself right in the can, and forced myself to go back to school.

2.)  I’m glad I have so many people who try to bring me down.  Usually, that would be a hindrance to many people.  I mean, no one really likes to be hated, but without so many people telling me I couldn’t do it; that I wouldn’t do it; that I shouldn’t… it only made me push harder, faster, and stronger forward.  Their hatred and horrible words towards me only fueled my own drive.  So thank you haters.  You did more good to me than damage.  🙂

3.)  I’m glad that I waited to settle into a relationship.  No seriously.  I’m really glad I have been such a cynic about love all of these years.  It made going through school that much easier.  I didn’t have to worry about a boyfriend dragging me down.  I didn’t have to worry about splitting my time up.  I didn’t have to worry about finding and dividing myself when I had to devote so much time and energy to medical school.  It’s really that simple.

4.)  I’m glad that unlike many of my friends (not that there is anything wrong with it), that I didn’t have a baby.  It’s one more expense that I don’t have money to put towards.  Maybe later down the line I will have the financial stability to have a baby.  To have a baby that I will love and cherish.  But right now, it’s just not the right time.  So, yes.  I’m glad I didn’t have a baby.  It allowed me to have that much more time towards med school.

5.)  I’m glad that I didn’t give up.  There were a lot of reasons all throughout my entire time at school to just want to give up and give in.  I might have under different circumstances, but I didn’t.  For that reason, if not any other reason, I can not be more proud of myself.  Going back was hard enough, but to quit and have to go back for a third time… well honestly, I might not have gone back again…

6.)  I’m glad I have some really awesome friends.  Some of which I met a year or so ago, some back in high school, some three months ago.  It doesn’t really matter how long they have been by my side, it’s the fact that they never left.  Even when shit hit the fan.  Pretty bad too. They have inspired me to push harder in class, conquer my fears, and honestly get the hell over my past reservations.  It’s hard for us to move ahead sometimes, but they pushed me to go on ahead.  I can’t thank them enough.  Without everyone standing behind me.  Rooting for me to go and follow this through to the end, I don’t know if I would have.  So thank you.  From the bottom of my heart, which seems to be thawing out lately, I thank you.  You are all more inspirational and loved more than you know.


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